I wish I would stop running away with my friends’ belongings.
No, you wish you were worth chasing.
I wish I could scream at the world.
No, you wish you were worth listening to.
I wish I could be the sky.
No, you wish you were worth looking at.
I wish I could disappear.
No, you wish you were worth finding.
You’re one to act like you understand me when you’ve been hiding all this time.
…
Where have you run off to?
How dare you run away with my memories?
How dare you run away with my emotions?
How dare you run away with my childish innocence?
You’re a petty thief, now I’ll never get those back.
No, you just haven’t caught up to me yet.
I’m so scared when I walk through the halls.
Scared of making eye-contact with those who knew me
While you were still around.
They might try to talk to me,
But the sound of my own voice hurts my ears.
No, you were just used to letting me do the talking.
You’re a coward just like everyone else.
I suppose I’m nice to look at from a distance.
When I’m cheery and optimistic and “Ms. Sunny Skies.”
When I start to cry and the rain pours down,
The people pull out their umbrellas and hide indoors.
No, I would dance in the rain and hug the sky.
I’ve been trying to drag you to the surface for years.
Do you realize how terrifying it is to be up here alone?
I put in so much effort to save you.
I almost saved you.
I know I saw you show your face.
Do you really like your hiding spot that much?
No, I dug myself into a void that
Is infinitely deeper than I thought.
So you don’t hate me?
No, I don’t.
Well, that doesn’t really matter if you aren’t here.
I oughta join you down there, I suppose.
No, stay up there.
Otherwise, neither of us will ever be free.
A little bit about this poem...
This poem was another spur-of-the-moment thing. It was a rendition of a concept I had before where people who steal things from their friends to cause mischief actually just want to be worth chasing (I'll be posting the original poem eventually). I ended up adding onto it in this manner simply because I wanted it to be more presentable for the school writing contest, where I ended up winning 3rd place with this poem.
This poem turned into more of a dialogue with my younger self, or my inner child. For me, becoming an adult made it easy to feel detached from what made me happy because a major part of my personality was a childish, carefree facade. A lot of the things I enjoyed seemed unacceptable simply because I turned 18, so I craved be younger again and continued to portray myself as childish so I wouldn't get called out. Alongside that, I felt like my younger self was deprived of many things and that I had to become mature too quickly. However, I'm more in-touch with my inner child nowadays, and I'm quick to enjoy myself without worrying too much if it's too childish for someone my age.
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